How to Find a Wedding Venue
You’re engaged. You’re here. And you’re looking for a wedding venue.
Turns out, we’ve done a few weddings. Thousands actually. At hundreds of different venues. Our goal is to make the venue search and wedding planning experience enjoyable, meaningful and fun. We’re going to take you under our wing, and we’re going to show you the in’s and out’s of finding your dream venue.
Your venue really sets the stage for everything to come. Together, we’re going to identify your priorities, provide you with insight and suggestions, give you resources and some great overall advice.
Identify Your Priorities
This is big. Carve out some time with your partner to sit down and do the dream work, which will start to identify your values and priorities for your wedding day. Close your eyes and think of your dream wedding. Jot down everything that comes to mind. Where are you standing when you exchange vows? What does the earth beneath you feel like? Who is standing beside you and celebrating with you? Is it intimate or expansive? Share your ideas and begin to paint your picture together.
Location: Think about what city you’d like to host your wedding. San Diego is a perfect place to get married with plenty of things to do for your out-of-town guests. If you want more of a destination feel, consider Palm Springs, Valle de Guadalupe or the Central Coast.
Ceremony + Reception: Unless you’re eloping or going to a church, we think it’s best to have your ceremony and reception in the same location to make it easier for everyone involved. A huge bonus if there are wedding suites to get ready and store your personal belongings.
Venue customization: There’s a venue for everyone, so think about what might be best for the two of you. We love a fully customized, styled wedding design with tons of details that show off your personality, so we gravitate toward a blank slate venue with preferred vendors. If you’re reading this, chances are you want a more flexible venue too. But if you are the kind that just wants a package deal, check out Secret Garden, Wedgewood & Trademark venues with all in-house services.
Must-haves: This is the most important. When you do the dream work, decide early on what is a non-negotiable. Do you want your 90 year old grandma to be there? If so, she might not be able to make it to a destination location. If you want to have a late night dance party until 12am, a live band, seaside wedding pictures, cocktail hour in a spanish-style villa, a long table under the olive trees, the best food of your life, a cozy intimate dinner with great wines, or if you want to take over a boutique hotel in Palm Springs for the weekend, write it down and let it guide your decisions. Stay strong with your non-negotiables.
Budget: Wedding venues range from $8-15k in southern California. Be aware of how that fits into your total wedding budget. We think a venue should be about 5-10% of your total budget.
Date: Pick out one or two days that work for you and your closest people.
Spotlight on Private Estates
Consider the Wedding Experience
People, you included, is another huge priority when it comes to planning your wedding. Consider the bigger picture of how you want to feel on your wedding day. How do you want to be supported by those around you? What new and old traditions do you incorporate into your day? How do you best express yourselves during your wedding day? Answering these questions will give you guidance on the bigger picture and what kind of setting you continue to paint.
Consider the guest experience, too. Right from the start, how do you openly welcome guests so they feel excited and grateful to be there? What kind of ambiance are they walking into? Thinking about these details will further guide you in your vision and dream venue.
Spotlight on Venues with both Indoor & Outdoor Space
From left to right: The Inn at RSF, La Jolla Woman’s Club, San Diego Museum of Art
What’s your vibe?
Now that we have a general vision of the environment we’d like to create, we’re going to further pinpoint the style of the venue and discuss how your vibe, design and people fit into the space.
What’s your aesthetic?
Do you want a clean, modern vibe with a sunset over the city skyline? A sprawling mountain vista and dinner under the ancient oaks? A charming adobe villa with spanish tile and water features? A modern rustic winery in Valle de Guadalupe? A private estate with over the top florals? A big beautiful dinner under the stars in the middle of Joshua Tree? A modern downtown venue with lush florals and contemporary architecture? A historic home with a vintage vibe? A yacht off the coast? The options are endless. Go back to the dream work. What really speaks to you and your partner? And what are those non-negotiables?
Highly designed vs. Minimal
Most venues already have a design aesthetic working for them, so lean into that as your overall vibe and design style. Your vendors, installations, decor, overall themes and florals will add to that aesthetic.Design + Style
Think about the design you want to go for. This will help tailor your choice in venue as you get ready to set the stage. Which of these words speak to you as a couple? Modern, edgy, bright, colorful, boho, natural, minimal, muted, simple, romantic, delicate, alternative, moody, rustic, vintage, whimsical, sleek, bold, laid-back, elegant, charming, formal, posh, traditional, grandiose, ornate, exquisite, glamorous, lavish. Circle a few or make up your own. Let these keywords guide you in your style when you research venues and also when you call on your vendors.Size of your gathering
Get an idea of what your guest count might be. There may be some venues that are just completely off limits due to your guest count. Many venues comfortably fit between 80-150 people. Other venues are in the 250-400 person capacity. You just don’t want the room to feel empty if you opt for a larger space.
Spotlight on Minimal Venues
Left to right: The Lane, Building 177, JULEP
Get Ready for the Search
Now that you have identified your priorities and you have a general idea of what you’re looking for, the search for a venue should be easier.
Ask the Experts
If you have a planner or vendors you’re considering, reach out and ask for guidance. Or poke around their websites for inspiration. Even if we don’t have an opportunity to work with you, we will absolutely guide you and suggest a few options on great gathering spaces.Research it
There are some resources like Venue Report, Wedding Wire, or The Knot that share details on some amazing venues. One small thing to keep in mind is these platforms often require venues to pay in order to be listed. Often times you can find free resources on your vendors’ platforms, even if it is just a list of venues they work at.Reach out Directly
Email the venues directly, share your priorities, explain your aesthetic and ask for resources like venue specs, budget, house rules, vendor list and any other requirements.
Spotlight on Coastal Venues
From left to right: Martin Johnson House, Scripps Seaside Forum, Darlington House
Understanding Venue House Rules
The knitty gritty of it. Some things to consider before booking your venue.
Vendor Lists
Every venue has a different approach to vendors they allow in their space. Some venues have an exclusive list of vendors you must use or preferred vendor list with vetted, trusted sources. There are reasons these lists exist, but it’s mainly for you to have the best possible experience. Lean on that list and those vendors. It is extremely helpful if your vendors have worked in the space before, specifically food and beverage.All Inclusive Venue vs. BYO Vendors
Some venues are all-inclusive, such as Estancia La Jolla Hotel or Leo Carrillo or Secret Garden, and you’re paying a package price for services provided by specific vendors. Sometimes you’re able to bend those rules (if you reaaaaaally want MIHO to cater), you just have to ask. Other venues like Ultimate Skybox, SD Museum of Art, La Jolla Woman’s Club or Japanese Friendship Garden are more flexible and allow you to bring in your own vendors or select from a list. Be sure you know the agreement, so you know the rules upfront and can budget accordingly.What’s included in the venue rental?
Find out what is already included in the venue rental and if there are additional in-house services or requirements. Ask about lighting, tables, chairs, security, heat/AC, sound, electricity, restrooms, parking, valet. The best venues have a flexible load-in/out time. Your rental company should be there at least five hours before cocktail hour starts. This will give you enough time for your other vendors to load in and install.General Communication
Like we said in the very beginning, this should feel like a smooth, enjoyable process. You should like the people you’re working with. If it isn’t easy now, it’s not going to get any better.
Spotlight on Rural Outdoor Venues
From left to right: Olive View Ranch, San Diego Botanic Gardens, Sacred Mountain
Book the Venue!
Dates
If all looks good, place a soft hold on the date of your choosing and book a tour! Keep in mind, venues work together often. If it’s a close match, but the venue doesn’t have your date available or it’s not a perfect fit, ask for a suggestion. Their referral will go a long way.Contract
If the venue aligns with your vision and values, ask for a contract. Be sure to read through the fees and cancellation policies. If everything looks good, sign and submit a deposit for the venue.Vendors
Once you’ve booked your venue, it’s time to start looking for your other vendors. You can continue to come back to your vision, values and priorities. I know everyone says this, but the wedding planning process should be fun. You should love your planner and your vendors. They’ll love you and show up for you in return.
Spotlight on New Venues
From left to right: MCASD, The Guild Hotel, Luce on Kettner
THE BIG TAKEAWAY
As you browse through all of these amazing spaces, it’s easy to get overwhelmed or to be drawn to multiple different looks. Our big takeaway is for you to focus on those priorities you and your partner talked about early on. Let those non-negotiables be your guiding light.
And if you need any suggestions or additional resources, reach out to our team: contact@amihoexperience.com. We’d be happy to help guide you to choose the best wedding venue for your wedding!
